it’s not a dream anymore, it’s worth fighting for

Small Update. I had training last night with my physical trainer and he mentioned that I looked like I lost since last Thursday. I was a little apprehensive about stepping on the scale since last visit but I said what hell. Let’s do it. So I got on the scale and I was pleasantly surprised to ssee that I lost another 4 pounds. I am now at 82 pounds lost with just 18 pounds to go until I reach 100 pounds down. I wish I could lose it by the end of the year just so i can say in 2011 I LOST one hundred pounds but I won’t beat myself up if I don’t. I am not in a contest. I am doing this for me. I’m not losing weight to impress anyone but myself (although I do love the support and accolades.) I like that I’m doing it to make myself feel better- that i’m not doing it to impress any men. I have been reconsidering my intial thought of the men that nknew me 82 pounds ago. Like if all of the sudden they magically want to date me after I lose a whole bunch of weight should I automactically write them off as shallow? I really am the same person but I will say I am a lot happier to be around and I feel more hopeful than ever before that things are going to really be okay. Should I take that into account? I guess it all depends on the guy. I can’t dictate who I fall for (lord. knows. that’s. true.) but I’m so lost on all this. I guess if the situation comes up I’ll play it by ear. just random thoughts keep popping up in my head. It’s a little personal and while I am very open and honest some things I just can’t share. Like matters of the heart and its fragile state. Well, okay, i’ll say it. My heart is very fragile and I just don’t know if any one is capable to be responsible for it. I wish someone would step up though, i’ll say that. I’m willing to try. I really am. Is any one else?


4 thoughts on “it’s not a dream anymore, it’s worth fighting for

  1. I can’t think of a breakup I’ve gone through that was easy. I’m very quick to trust guys I start dating and I often find myself hurt in the end. And with all that being said, I’m still willing to put myself out there in hopes of eventually finding someone that makes me happier than I was before they were in my life. For now, focus on you. You’re doing an awesome job and getting healthy and you’re staying motivated and positive about everything. If something happens, it happens. And if it doesn’t, you still have you to be happy about.

  2. As far as the guys go – I wouldn’t write them off as shallow. If you’ve noticed you’re happier to be around now that you’ve lost 82 lbs (WAY. TO. GO!!!!), it could be that they, too, are noticing this and it is causing them to be more interested in you now. šŸ™‚ You could at least give them a chance. šŸ˜‰

    Break-ups always suck, but if you don’t take the chance, you might miss the dance. šŸ™‚ (Ok that was bad. LOL)

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