New years eve= blast

seriously this explains it all. I’m glad i see in that video how fucking huge i’ve gotten. It is soo crazy I have never, I mean NEVER, seen myself like that and thats how people see me? I’m a fucking jabba the hut mixed with the puffy ghost from ghostbusters.

see the similarities from the video?
But in the morning I’m heading to weight watchers. I’m signing up. I don’t wanna live looking like that. Who the fuck wants to date THAT?? 9:30 am. I’m more scared to find out actually how much I weigh. 360? 380? No scale in my house goes above 300 😦 with all this bull shit valentines day stuff I wanna be loved! I want love and I wanna be loved. But if anyone loves me at this size there’s obviously something wrong with them. I am a disaster. A big. Fat. Disaster. So new year new start. Please help me with lots and lots of support. I need it. Every monday I vow to show my points card with a pic of my weight and it’ll keep me in check. 20 pounds, at least, by valentines day.


2 thoughts on “New years eve= blast

  1. I will support you! I am always willing to support someone who wants to become healthier and better themselves. I personally think if someone loves no matter what your weight is, nothing is wrong with them, they just don’t care what you look like because they have fallen for who you are. Good luck with everything, and your New Years seems like it was fun =]

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